Skip to content
yourinductionsucks.fyi

07 - Reframing

Reframing is thankfully pretty intuitive! It’s mostly a therapeutic tool, but it’s handy for conversation, hypnosis, and kink as well. If you use this a lot - it might be worth picking up a copy of Kinky NLP - just for some inspiration.

ABCs

From sleepingirl on Kinky NLP, coming from Robert Dilts from Sleight of Mouth, there’s the ‘ABCs’ for reminders of how things can be framed…

  • A - Who I Am (Identity) - Am I a cheesemaker?
  • B - My Beliefs and values - Do I care about cheese?
  • C - Capabilities or abilities - Being a cheesemaker vs someone who works cutting the cheese at a shop.
  • D - What I Do / Have Done - I cut the cheese, and I’m capable of cutting the cheese well, but it’s not who I am and not connected to what I believe in.
  • E - My Environment - When I cut the cheese, it became part of the environment. (Or, I work in a cheese factory.)

For example - say you’d like to do a session with someone, they’re interested, but think it goes against their identity as a dom. Here’s some ideas…

  • Reframe it as you can give them a relaxation session as a service. (Reinforcing how they feel, or who they are. )
  • You’re helping them understand what it’s like from the other side - making them a better dom. (Using their frame of them as a dom, or who they are. )
  • Sessions are a thing you do - not a component of who you are. (Moving it away from an identity over to something they do.)

Other Components

Sleepingirl also suggests another few things on framing:

  • Time - much like future pacing. Is something about to happen? Were they a less responsive subject in the past?
  • Good vs Bad - This is a big one - reframe ‘failures’ in hypnosis as information - which is good, it’ll help you respond better and learn about what works.
  • Who - What sort of person are you, really?

Other Examples

Okay - here’s an example. Say you’re dipping your toes into changework or you’re working recreationally. From MMHA - you’d like to use a catalepsy convincer - or your legs not being able to move. You can always do the stage hypnotist thing - but if they’re a bit skiddish, you can frame this as something fun. It’s like being at the beach and you’re hanging out with some friends, and they team up to bury your legs to where you can’t move them, and it’s funny.

Or - something from Mindfucking Mindfully - where you can use a role to your advantage to get a scene rolling.

There are many advantages to this [roleplaying] practice.  Perhaps the D-type is in a bad habit of asking for feedback in the middle of the scene and killing the mood.  To use a previous example, maybe the doctor/patient role-play is specifying that the patient is mute.  Perhaps the D-type has a nasty habit of being too delicate with the s-type and role-playing a prison guard can help them get out of that headspace for the evening.  Perhaps the s-type is not in the habit of serving the D-type and the Queen and servant role-play can be a way to get into a service role without feeling degraded (it is after all a privilege to serve the Queen).

Algos, Sir Ezra. Mindfucking Mindfully: A Guide To Mental Manipulation For BDSM And Sadomasochism (p. 49). House of Algos Inc.. Kindle Edition.

Utilization

While this isn’t quite utilization, you can think of it almost the same way… just less hypnotically.

  • While you may feel that way Right now…
  • S: “I feel a afraid…” H: “Feeling a little bit of tension?”
  • Vibe changes. You’re doing a lewd scene - you can shift from your ‘lets get you into trance vibe’ to your ‘evil hypnotist vibe’ and suggest they’ve been coerced and trapped. You’ll need to read your partner’s feelings on this one.