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05 - Pretalk

At this point - I’ve probably melted your ears right off. Here’s what’s easily actionable:

  • Talk about what you want - it’s easier than making a comprehensive list of flavors you don’t like.
  • Highlight anything to avoid - like underwater deepeners. Alternatively - just get a direction and talk out a plan. “That all sounds good” or “no, I have a fear of staircases” are pretty easy discussions to have.
  • If there’s anything risky - talk that out. What’s the safety plan? Grab a friend? Milk and cookies? Does the conversation itself sound uncomfortable? (If so, maybe consider not doing something stupid?)
  • Is the session particularly emotional? Will your hypnotist need aftercare? (Would they like aftercare?)
  • Ask your hypnotist if there’s anything they’d like to try. They might have some fun ideas!
  • What’s fun about this whole thing for both of you? Aim for more of that.

Pre-talks don’t have to be all business - they can also serve to get you both excited. Shoot each-other some lewd art and see if you can incorporate some of those ideas. Or, if there’s some spicy story that stimulates your synapses, share it along! If it feels like you’re both getting ramped up to go on a wild ride, and you’re checking your safety boxes along the way, you’re doing it right.

For a bit more, read sleepingirl’s writeup about safer consent practices.

Disclosures and Check-Ins

  • How’s your vibe check today? Are you in a good emotional state for this or would it be a better idea to do something lighter?
  • Do you have any mental health issues that may pose a risk? Have you checked in to associated risks and informed your hypnotist? Are they also comfortable with the risk? Can you personally handle it if something goes wrong? If not - do you have a support structure there to lend a hand?
  • What’s your safety system like? How do you both plan to check in with each-other?

A Few More…

Additional ideas for the smoothest ride:

  • Do learn to communicate and ask for coaching.
  • Do check in on your hypnotist’s comfort level - they may not want to brainwash you.
  • Do set limits and boundaries.
  • Do check in on your hypnotists limits and boundaries.
  • Do check on your hypnotists preferences.

If consent checklists work for you both that’s great! Use them. But the checklist is there to facilitate communication, no the other way around.

Further Reading

  • Negotiation from Binaural Histolog. More geared towards the hypnotist - but less unhinged than my writeup.